How to Choose a Therapist

When your car breaks down, you want a good mechanic: someone who’s got the skills to understand what’s wrong with your engine and the right parts in stock to fix it, at a price you can afford. In some ways, choosing the right therapist is a lot like choosing the right mechanic. You want someone with the experience and skills to help you, who has time enough to see you, at a price you can pay.

The big difference between choosing a mechanic and choosing a counselor, of course, has to do with the relationship you must build with your therapist if counseling is to be useful and successful. It doesn’t matter much if your mechanic’s personality is gruff or he doesn’t have the best "people skills." You don’t need or want to spend a lot of time with him; you just want him to fix your car. In a counseling relationship, on the other hand, you’re going to need to feel comfortable enough with the therapist to talk about some very personal - and sometimes very painful – things. It’s not important that she likes the Yankees and you like the Mets (if you’re spending that much time talking baseball during your sessions, you probably need to look for another therapist!) but you should feel comfortable with, trust and respect your counselor, or you may not get as much out of therapy as you expected or hoped for when you entered the relationship.

Once you’ve decided to give therapy a try, your first task is to get the names of at least three therapists within reasonable distance of your home or work location. It’s best not to "let your fingers do the walking" through the yellow pages for these names. Ask trusted friends and family members about their positive experiences with psychotherapists in the area. Clergypersons and physicians frequently refer their clients to counseling and are usually a good source of information about competent local mental health professionals. Massage therapists, acupuncturists, and other alternative-medicine practitioners may also be helpful in providing you with a list of names.

Your next step is to contact at least three of these counselors and request a brief, initial telephone consultation with them. Most therapists are willing to spend ten or fifteen minutes on the phone answering some basic questions about their practice experience and philosophy. Some counselors will send you an information packet upon request, with literature related to their education, experience and practice specialties. Others have websites where you can review their practice interests, credentials, fee policies, and other important information. Be sure to inquire about fees, which can range from $40 to over $100 per hour. Some counselors accept reimbursement through medical insurance plans, while others do not. If you intend to use your medical insurance to pay for therapy, be sure to ask the counselor during this initial telephone call whether she accepts the insurance plan you hope to use.

After you’ve conducted your telephone screening, choose the two therapists who seemed like the best match for you, and schedule initial consultations with each of them. The point of these interviews is primarily for you and the counselor to get to know one another and develop a feel for whether you’d be able to work well together. The therapist will undoubtedly have some specific questions about your background, history, and current problems. This is your opportunity, also, to ask questions which will help you determine whether this therapist is right for you. Some good questions to ask include:

"How many years have you been in practice?" Because the art of psychotherapy is learned mostly through experience, the more years in practice, the better.

"Are you licensed to practice in this state?" The licensure requirements in Florida and most other states are extremely rigorous, and often require testing and practice supervision. This ensures a level of competence which protects you, the recipient of services, so think twice before seeing an unlicensed practitioner.

"How many clients have you seen with problems like mine?" Remember our mechanic analogy? You wouldn’t bring your Saab to the Ford dealership for repair, and you don’t want a therapist whose practice is limited to adolescents if you’re in a mid-life crisis. If you are gay or lesbian, you may prefer to see a counselor with personal and/or professional experience in that community. Fortunately, we are long past the days when alternative sexual preference was considered an illness which required treatment. Still, it is perfectly reasonable for you to specifically ask the prospective counselor about her experience and level of comfort with the social and psychological issues which pertain to the alternative-sexuality community.

"Can you tell me something about your professional background?" Listen for enthusiasm. A counselor who describes a vibrant career with an array of professional experiences, and who is actively engaged in continuing education activities, is likely to bring freshness and energy to her work.

"Can I contact you in between sessions? Is there an additional charge for this?" Therapists vary in their policies about between-session contact. It’s best to ask this question up front, so you won’t be surprised or disappointed if the therapist is not as accessible to you as you’d hoped for her to be.

The right therapist will welcome your questions, and her posture will be non-defensive, open, and calm. Gauge your level of comfort in the counseling office. Is it a space where you can relax enough to talk? Is it welcoming? Clean? Private? Does it feel safe?

Ideally, you will choose a licensed psychotherapist who has comprehensive practice experience, projects a respectful, non-judgmental attitude, and works in a comfortable office environment. The right relationship is absolutely key to your counseling success, so take your time and make sure the "fit" is right before committing to a plan of treatment with any practitioner.